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How Does a Collaborative Divorce Differ From an Adversarial Divorce?

Client-Attorney Communication

Adversarial Divorce Collaborative Divorce
Client meets only with his/her attorney. Contact with the other party is usually limited to court hearings where the judge decides the issues. Client meets privately with his/her attorney and with his/her spouse and the other attorney in a series of four-way conferences to identify issues, brainstorm possible solutions and reach settlement. There are no court hearings and a judge is not involved.

Where The Legal Fees Go

Adversarial Divorce Collaborative Divorce
Majority of attorney's billable time is spent on hearings, filing motions for disclosure of information, taking depositions and appearing at court proceedings. Both participants and their attorneys agree in advance to full disclosure of all relevant information, so no motions or depositions are needed. The majority of time is spent in meetings directly discussing issues and creating settlement solutions.

Who Decides What And When

Adversarial Divorce Collaborative Divorce
Ultimate decisions on main issues of custody, support, visitation, spousal maintenance and property and debt distribution are decided by a judge after a contested trial or during a short pre-trial conference shortly before trial, after many hearings, discovery efforts and preparation for trial have occurred. Ultimate decisions on all issues are made by the participants in a settlement agreement prepared by the attorneys. Rather than focusing on settlement only after months of adversarial posturing, motions and temporary court orders, the entire process is aimed at settlement.

Post Divorce Relationships

Adversarial Divorce Collaborative Divorce
Divorce litigation is often a traumatic, hurtful experience to all concerned. Testifying against your spouse and hearing what your spouse has to say about you in order for him/her to "win" often leads to long-term alienation, lack of trust and a deep-seeded inability to work together regarding important issues of post-divorce custody, visitation and child rearing. Many people consider their divorce proceedings as one of the worst experiences in their lives, even if they "won" the case. Since all decisions are made jointly by both participants, there is a strong sense of satisfaction and accomplishment when the case is settled, Although divorcing couples are not expected to be best friends afterwards, being able to work through tough decisions and reach settlements together empowers participants to have confidence that they will be able to continue to discuss and resolve future issues that might arise. This feeling of being able to work together, especially in cases involving children, is considered by most collaborative divorce participants as being more important than "winning" every point in court.
 

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